Wednesday, September 24, 2008

No Liars Here!

For some strange reason, even though my boys can run crazy all over the house or park, they seem completely incapable of running laps at soccer practice without bringing shame to the family name. Jared's family name, of course. You see, I see myself in them. I have never enjoyed running, nor have I been very good at it. But I do firmly believe that if I learned to push myself harder and run more often, I could be better at running. And I am noticing that in many areas (not just physical) I am needing to teach the principle that "we can do hard things." I do not want to raise kids who give up at the first sign of some hard work.

So, in an effort to teach my boys how to be runners and how to do hard things, I have determined to add lap-running to our curriculum. In all honesty, this event occurs about once a week, although I pictured it happening on a daily basis. And it's my fault. Did I mention that I hate running?

Today after Henry's speech appointment we headed over to the park with a $5 pizza from my favorite franchise. The boys were surprised to find out that before we ate any of the greasy goodness, we would be running laps around the park: our age plus 2. (No, I did NOT run 37 laps; thanks for asking.)

Henry, the one who just might be confused for someone with his legs painted on at soccer practice, was the first to enthusiastically run all 8 of his laps. The kid never stopped once to walk. I don't know if his father would have been proud or infuriated, but his father wasn't there. I slapped him a high five and gave him a slice of pepperoni.

Ian finished next and threw himself down on the blanket for his reward. Five laps is really nothing for him, as he seems to have the boundless energy required for lap running--the reason that he didn't finish earlier had to do with the allure of the park equipment.

I had started running laps with them but had been seriously hampered by a 19 month old who freaks out when she sees her mother running away. I kept moving around the path and would occasionally jog for several yards, but wasn't making very fast progress with her in my arms. I guess this wasn't going to count as my workout today. I had, however, lapped Kimball, who had petered out after two laps and was walking quite slowly while moaning. The rest of us cheered him on and encouraged him through the next several laps, which he alternately walked and jogged half-heartedly.

When he got to his last 2 laps, he asked me to run with him. I got Bronwen interested in a piece of garlic bread and agreed. We took off and he sprinted far ahead (I knew he was being lazy earlier and was not so easily winded as he made out to be.) Laughing, he looked back at me and taunted:

"Mom! I'm faster than you!"

"Yes, you sure are!"

Then, with absolutely no malice in his voice, but just the matter-of-factness of youth, he said, "Maybe it's because of all that weight."

I guess it's better than having random people asking me when I'm due, but it stung nonetheless.

"Yes, son, I'm sure you're right."

I wanted to double his lap requirement at that point, but I didn't particularly want to jog 10 more with him, so I let it slide and went over to nurse my wounds with a slice of pizza pie.

Kids don't cut you any slack, do they? Your friend might tell you how great you look and that all those workouts must be paying off, but your kid will never lie. Dadburnit!


Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

First of all, thanks for your blog visit today and NICE comment.

Okay, (deep breath) this is what happened to me: I had to go to the bathroom at the mall and took my 3 year old into the stall with me. In the process he started saying, "Wow, mom, you have a really big bum." I was like "ok, Grant, thanks," but he KEPT saying it. "But MOM, you really DO have a big bum!" I wanted to flush myself down the toilet and let him find his own way home. Bless those honest little dears.

On the lighter side, good job to run laps for pizza! I did a full workout at the gym today and then obliterated it at Sonic. sigh.

Prudy said...

Michal, I was snickering from the start. This was hilarious! Just today as I was coming around the corner, Sailor said, "Mom, you scared me; I saw your big black shadow!" All day long I keep thinking of myself as a big black bloppy shadow. Not a good image. Not a good self image. Pass the pizza, would ya?

Mahina said...

hahahahaha! that is so true that kids don't lie! if you want an honest to goodness, no sugar coating opinion or answer just ask your kids!!

hahahahaha! love it!

Keli and Mike said...

While I was pregnant and visiting family, my younger brother told me that I would have to use the upstairs shower because I wouldn't fit in the basement one. My brothers are 12 and 10 and ALWAYS brutally honest.

Erika said...

ha ha ha ha ha . Oh gosh. I'm not laughing at you. I'm totally picturing Kimball "walking quite slowly while moaning." Gosh. Hilarious.
Its the Johnson in them would do anything for food :-)

Macy said...

Love it. Sorry about the comment. I'm getting those a lot lately. Usually from kindergartners. Thank goodness we have friends that are nice and notice when we work out.

Anonymous said...

Children! Owen has taken to calling me "chubby face" as a term of endearment, you would think growing up with brothers we would get used to it...nope.

Tamlynn said...

Too funny! Your kids are cracking me up. Love the America vs. Clubea story too.

Anonymous said...

I beg to differ. Kids are not always honest. They don't hesitate to lie for their own protection, as in "I didn't do it!"

Rebecca said...

Oh my yes, aren't kids the best? No inflating your ego there.

Missed you! Stopping by here on my way to Didyoufinishyourmathyet Land.

scrap chair potato said...

Oh, I've been there. This summer I was getting ready to go swimming when Dusty asked me why I was so jiggly.
I think I should run 30 laps before I eat a cookie. I may not run more, but I would eat a lot less cookies. :)

My Ice Cream Diary said...

My son likes to ask me why I have golden teeth and how I got them so yellow. Yeeeeah, it doesn't make me feel like smiling.

P.S. I miss posting and visiting everyone's blogs. It is hard giving up my freedoms to babylife again, but it's worth it. Thanks for missing me. =)