Real Families, Real Answers

Have you seen this show on BYU-TV? It is absolutely wonderful!
I have been watching it recently and find each episode to be uplifting, encouraging, and thought-provoking. It is clearly written for all families (not specifically an LDS audience), and in fact is careful to refer to faith generally rather than a faith specifically. The show is really well done and professional.

Some of the topics that they discuss are: family finances, parenting strategies, parenting teens, blended families, strengthening marriages, overcoming addictions, single parenting, and more. It makes me think about our own family traditions, discipline, and communication style.

Most people outside of Utah will find that BYU Television is included in their cable or satellite package. If you don't have access on TV, you can watch the show here.

The Greatest of Causes

I am loving the current issue of BYU Magazine. There are a few articles in it that are giving me food for thought. The following quote, (from the commencement address at BYU in 1994 by James Q. Wilson, then of UCLA,) is one that found to be both inspiring and fitting for my blog's theme of motherhood.

"The easiest thing to do is to support great causes, sign stirring petitions, endorse grand philosophies. The hardest thing to do--and it is getting harder all the time--is to be a good husband, a good wife, a strong father, a strong mother, an honorable friend and neighbor."

So think about one thing that you can do today in your quest for greatness in one of these areas. I choose to make a concerted effort to show more tenderness to my family today.

Three Women, One Man, and a Baby

No, it's not a new show about an alternative family. It just describes my recent trip. I had the privilege of visiting some former BYU roommates, McArthur and Neves, in Washington, D.C. this past weekend. I took Bronwen with me on her first cross-country adventure, and we left the male folk at home to fend for themselves. Here are a few highlights of our trip:

• A short but great visit with Rebecca, my cousin, and her two little boys. I took about 15 pictures of her two year old, Brandon, and not a single one was any good. Bummer. So you won't get to see anything from that.
• Bronwen and I alone with McArthur's car, trying to get from Alexandria, where Rebecca lives, to Reagan National Airport, where I was supposed to pick up McArthur, and Dylan (Neves' hubby). Apparently, one of the security measures in the D.C. area is that you are never really sure where you are at any given moment, nor will you reach your intended destination on the first attempt, even if you are a local! (And I thought, being raised in LA, "I'm a city girl! How hard can it be?")
• A drive out to the northwestern part of Virginia. If it had not been raining and grey, this would have been absolutely breathtaking. It was rather lovely anyway, but I didn't get any photos of this either, much to my chagrin!
• A shopping to trip to "Gabe's", a discount store akin to TJMaxx, but on a much larger scale. I've been hearing about Gabe's and drooling over the deals acquired for 16 years now. Now I know what I've been missing.
  
• Dinner at a fabulous little tavern in Upperville, VA.
• A visit to D.C.'s Eastern Market on Saturday morning to check out the international flea market, farmer's and fresh food market, and to enjoy a maple pecan french toast breakfast. Yum. There were many booths to explore with jewelry from all over the world, photography, textiles, and architectural remnants. We would have lingered longer if it hadn't been frigid (the weather report had predicted sunny and 50 degrees. Not once did we see those kind of temperatures.)
• A free concert at the Kennedy Center on the Millenium Stage. In spite of it being a standing room only crowd, it was worth it to see the Kenyan children's choir and acrobats who performed there. Bronwen made some friends while crawling around the floor under Kennedy's head. This brother and sister duo were so adorable and so into her--they cried when their parents finally said it was time to go.
• Another great dinner, this time at an Indian restaurant on Capital Hill, near McArthur's home. Since everyone else at our table had been to India multiple times, they knew the best food to order and delighted me with everything I tasted.
  
• Here's a shot of our charming hostess, McArthur. She always was the photogenic one.
• I prepped Bronwen ahead of time that she needed to be on her best behavior, as these friends have not yet made the jump into parenthood, and I did not want to be responsible for scaring them away any further. At the end of the weekend, they pronounced her a "false advertising baby," skeptical that all babies could possibly be as easy as she. Nice work, Bronwen! Our plan worked perfectly!
• The most miraculous part of the trip was that we didn't have any delayed flights, missed flights, six hour stints on the tarmac without moving, lost baggage, or screaming on airplanes. Our flights were pretty uneventful, which is a huge improvement over the last time I paid these friends a visit with baby Henry back in 2002. That was a nightmare (not the part where we actually got to be together, shopping for Neves' wedding gown--just all the traveling parts.)
• I left wanting more. Not only more of my friends, whom I see too little of these days, but of D. C. I spent the flight home dreaming up ways that we could move our family there for six months and explore all the city has to offer, then wander up and down that coast. Washington D.C. is a homeschooler's paradise, with all of the free educational places available to visit. Maybe we'll be able to swing it someday, somehow!

Anyway, I'm home now, and busy with laundry, Tiger Academy, laundry, preparing for Thanksgiving next week, and more laundry. Hopefully I'll be able to post again soon.

The Family Road Trip

This week, as we prepare for a family trip, I am reflecting on the Family Road Trip of my day. In one generation, this phenomenon has changed dramatically. Let's revisit the road trips of yore for a few minutes. OK, we'll be reflecting on the road trips of my family of origin, which may have looked completely different from your family road trips. But as I explained to my husband when we were newlyweds, my family is the epitome of normal, healthy, and mainstream--any deviance from our way must be condemned as false, dysfunctional, and truly bizarre!
Every summer in my childhood, we would load up the family car for a trip that would end in Idaho. Most of my friends' families would never have taken a trip that far in the car, but most of my friends had two siblings, tops. My parents never would have considered flying all eight of us to Idaho or anywhere else!
In my younger years, our vehicle was a Volkswagen Vanagon; years later, we traded that in for a Dodge Ram Van. These road trips took place in the days before seatbelt laws, dependable air conditioning, and DVD players. Often, we would leave while it was still dark in order to beat the heat of the desert and so as to avoid overheating the car as we climbed Cajon pass. We would spread out all over the back of the van (wherever there was a space not filled with luggage.) We would argue over who could stretch out on the floor and go to sleep. Generally, we traveled with a portacrib in the cargo area of the van with the luggage underneath and on the sides, so that the baby could travel in the crib! It seems so ridiculous now, but my mother was quite proud of that idea and we used it many times. We would listen to my parents' music mostly, which is why we know all the words to James Taylor, Carole King, Bob Dylan, Randy Newman, Paul Simon, and Steeley Dan. We also enjoyed the Police, show tunes (Les Miserables when I was a teenager), and our family favorite, Wierd Al Yankovic. We'd memorize scriptures together (my dad's idea), make up stories, and on our mega road trip one year (across the country and back), we even wrote a song and produced a music video. We never stopped at a fast food place for lunch--we were all about the cooler that Mom had packed that was wedged between the two front seats and doubled as a jump seat for a child who was causing trouble in the back. We'd play card games in the back seat and I generally read at least two novels while we were on the road.
Our trip would start in Southern California and go along I-15, through Baker (home of the world's largest thermometer, Las Vegas (which my dad liked to call Nineveh, and which we usually drove right past,) St. George, (where my dad had a former mission buddy. We would often crash on their floor or in sleeping bags in their backyard. Most years, they had about 2 hours notice that we were coming to town because my dad's one responsibility in getting ready for the trip was to call them.) Our next stop after St. George was Provo, Utah, home of my future alma mater (also my parents' alma mater.) Aunt Kim lived there and we would usually spend a few days at her house, going up to the BYU campus, eating at Heaps of Pizza (which everyone else called Brick Oven--since Heaps was the late 60's and early 70's name of the place), going to Temple Square in Salt Lake City, (that's me with Baby Tyler) and visiting various other Utah landmarks. After a few days, we would get back in the car and head to Idaho Falls, where my grandma, aunt & uncle, and cousins lived. We'd spend a night or two there, then pack up and go to Grandma's cabin on Palisades Reservoir. (My sister, Alli. Isn't she cute?) This is where I have the best summer vacation memories. I'll have to post about that tomorrow--it deserves it's own.
Once we left Idaho, we'd retrace our steps, although often we'd get a hotel room in Utah so that 1) we wouldn't wear out our welcome with relatives and 2) we could swim in the hotel pool. We'd arrive home so grateful to be there; we were tired, y, and with enough laundry to bury a few small children (I only know that now, Mom!)
We took other road trips, too, including to Sequoia National Forest, Washington, DC, upstate New York, the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, and many other destinations. Now that I look back on it, I am in awe of my parents. They were determined for us to see the country and made sure that we did, in spite of the inconvenience of traveling with six squabbling kids. And to think that I barely survived my 400ish mile drive home from Whittier this month because the DVD player was malfunctioning!

Dinner with Elder Neves

Back in the fall of 1991, my parents dropped me off at Fugal Hall at BYU. I had really planned my entire life on going to BYU, but now that I was there I was filled with apprehension. What had I done? Here I was on a campus of 30,000 people, 650 miles away from home, and I was pretty sure that my cousin Jan was the only person I knew there. I put my things in my new bedroom and wandered down the hall to the kitchen/living area of our small apartment. There sat a striking red head who reminded me of Nicole Kidman: tall and slender with creamy skin. She turned out to be one of my best friends through all my years at BYU and beyond. Neves (there were so many people in our dorm with the same first name as her that we fixed on her last name) introduced me to the BYU Mens' Chorus (the Thanksgiving of American Folk Hymns and Celebration of Christmas albums are from my days there and are must haves) and the two of us were groupies, sitting in on rehearsals most days. We were in awe of the conductor, Mack Wilberg (who has since become the assistant conductor of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir) and his ability to arrange familiar songs into amazing feasts for the ears. Neves and I took Italian together for four semesters and irritated our other roommates by speaking it on an off all day. She was so impressive to me because she thoroughly researched anything that interested her and seemed to know about everything under the sun. She introduced our apartment full of mates to various festivals held in the Salt Lake region (the Scottish and Greek festivals were our favorites,) to the Pie, a U of U hangout, and to chicken jambalya. Neves wrote to me the most faithfully of anyone while I was a missionary in Russia--more frequently than my mother--and I loved her letters which were stimulating, hilarious, intelligent, and random in their subject matter. Neves continues to awe me with her amazing wit, her impressive knowledge, and her world travel is something I try not to covet. I am so glad to call her my friend.
Anyhow, this homage to Neves came about today because her baby brother, Elder Neves, came to dinner last night at my mom's house. Not long ago, Neves had emailed me that he was in Whittier, so while I was here we decided to invite him and his companion (missionaries are never, ever alone except for in the bathroom!) to come over. It was a delight to see again the six year old boy that I met that fall, whom I have enjoyed immensely every time I've seen him since. He looked very well and was fun to have at our table.
Here's what we had for dinner:
Beef Carnitas from Cooking Light (I HIGHLY recommend this recipe. I've made it twice in the past few weeks)
Pinto Beans
Fruit Salad with Watermelon, Pineapple, Mango, and Banana with lime juice
Warm tortillas
Guacamole, Salsa, and Sour Cream
Brownies with Dryers Ice Cream

And speaking of Dryers Ice Cream (Edy's on the east coast), one of the flavors that we enjoyed last night was another walk down memory lane. In my high school days, one of my haunts was the Brown household. They always had lots of ice cream (we only had ice cream on birthdays at my house) and coconut popcorn--and my favorite flavor there was a chocolate ice cream with peanut butter cups in it. Why has my quest to find such and ice cream been so unfruitful up until now? Other chocolate PB ice creams have a vanilla--or even worse, a peanut butter base. But this is the real thing, with rich chocolate ice cream. You've got to try some. Not only will you love it, but if enough people buy the special flavor, they won't take it off the shelves. Here is the Dryers website--check out this flavor finder, where you can type in your favorite flavor and your zip code and they'll tell you where to find it. Such a cool tool.
OK, I must run. We are off to the beach today. I'll take lots of pictures and share our picnic food later.
As Neves would say, Cheerio!